I find it is a number of things working together to cause binge eating. It is definitely not caused by being weak-willed, not having any self-control, or having some flaw of character. This list doesn’t encompass everything that could be contributing to your unique situation, but it does cover the most common reasons I see frequently in my practice.
1. Restriction. In some form or another restricting your food for the purpose of weight loss is usually involved. All of my clients that binge eat have either been on diets at some point in their lives, have restricted their food in some way even if not through formal diets, or have experienced food insecurity from poverty or a chaotic upbringing. These forms of restriction cause them to both feel deprived psychologically and set off a powerful biological drive to overeat.
The solution is to teach your body that it is getting ample food from all food groups regularly and often. No more dieting or restricting in any way. Additionally, your psyche needs to know that it is getting the food it loves and craves, so eating “play” foods that you may have formerly banned is an essential part of the process. For those who have set up many food rules about not eating carbs or sugar, for example, this may seem terrifying or crazy. But, it is truly the most important step! Your mind and body must heal through eating enough food, eating a variety of foods throughout the day, and eating formerly banned foods.
2. Emotions. Somewhere along the way, you have learned to use food to cope with emotions. If you have ever dieted and then felt really stressed out, did you notice that the first thing you wanted to cope with the stress was food? Of course, because your body wants to be fed and balanced. When you’re dieting you’re out of balance, so when stress hits you instinctually turn to food for comfort. It’s your body’s way of saying, “OK, you’re stressed, but let’s get fed first so we can deal with the stress better.” And of course, you feel better after you eat, so it starts a pattern of going to food for stress–even if you’re not dieting or restricting anymore. Eventually, going to food for comfort backfires because you feel out of control and eat beyond normal satiety levels.
The solution is to learn to cope with emotions without using food. Through mindfulness practices, therapy, journaling, self-care strategies, and other positive coping skills, you can learn to recognize and take care of your emotions without resorting to food. Remember, when you eat over a problem or a feeling, you then have two problems. You’re stuffed and feeling awful about yourself and you still have the original problem.
3. Body Image. Not having a healthy sense of self leads to the restriction that leads to binges. You usually start restricting because you are unhappy with your body in the first place. This can be because you feel you don’t fit the ideal beauty standard, or because your parents were critical of your weight, or because having control of your food and your weight feels comforting in an otherwise unsafe environment.
The solution is to challenge the beauty standards you try to live up to, learn better coping strategies for living, develop a better sense of self-acceptance and appreciation, re-examine the weight that you think is appropriate and healthy for you, and learn the self-talk that will help you ride through “body image attacks” when they arise.
4. Habit. After years of going to food for coping and other reasons, you can simply establish binging as a habit that can be hard to break. Sounds simplistic, but some strategies that you would use to quit smoking or stop biting your nails can be every bit as effective for binge eating, especially combined with the other solutions mentioned above.
5. Mindset. Your thinking about food, your body, and diets can be skewed due to the unhelpful diet culture we live in. You beat yourself up for eating one bite of brownie then end up binging all day long. You don’t let yourself eat fruit because somewhere you learned that fruit had too much “sugar,” then binge your way through a tub of ice cream because you feel ashamed of eating fruit. You don’t exercise at all unless you workout so hard you become dizzy and feel sick. All these extreme forms of thinking lead to extreme behaviors around food.
The solution is to challenge all your black-and-white thinking around food. You can learn new ways of talking to yourself, discover the science behind why your food rules are not true and not helpful, and unlearn the damaging messages of diet culture so that you can make sound choices for yourself around food and exercise.
6. Trauma. Not all people with binge eating have experienced trauma, but a significant portion have. This can be the ongoing trauma of growing up in an alcoholic home, or a one-time sexual assault that catapults the desire for control over your life and emotions, or any number of other significant life events that leave you lacking the skills to cope effectively.
The solution is to deal with the trauma, when you are ready, at face value. Get professional help to uncover what happened to you, and find new ways to cope with it. Develop self-compassion and heal at depth.
If you are struggling with binge eating, just know that you are not alone. It is much more common than you think to turn to food as a coping mechanism.
Sending love and hugs today.
Erin
